School Lunch is a pain in my...side.

"Mom, when can I buy a school lunch?" are the first words out of Kid #1 each day. He just started first grade and this is the first time that school lunch has been available.

What I would like to say in response is "NEVER! No self respecting, food conscience mom would let their children eat green/grey meat, or fruit snacks that (no joke) say CONTAINS PORK PRODUCTS."

But I don't, because I painfully see that it's important to him to eat what he deems looks delicious. And more importantly, what his friends are eating.

His whole six years of life I have been able to avoid most fast food (we do venture to In and Out every few months, and he's been to Mc'D's once with Hubby and once with my parents. That's it for the fast food. That's not to say we don't go out for ice cream--we do that often. I find it much easier for kids to understand that dessert food is a treat, as opposed the a fast food burger; which a burger itself isn't the problem it's the quality of ingredients that make it healthy/unhealthy.

Although we talk about food quality constantly, I am fighting a system that says "school lunch is healthy and balanced." Which makes my head spin. Clearly meat does not normally come in those shades or texture.

What is a food conscience parent supposed to do?

To answer this, I called out the big guns: my friend is a well regarded local head shrinker ( I say that lovingly, of course). She is a great resource, as well as friend. I think every mom should have a Head Shrinker friend to bounce ideas/thoughts off of. She is so smart and calm not to mention super healthy, both in mind and body. She specializes in children/teenagers including those with eating disorders. Her diagnosis/prognosis on my school lunch issue: let him have school lunch once a week.

ONCE A WEEK? I think I almost passed out. She asked, in her very professional voice, "is that going to be difficult for you?"

Frankly YES, was my response. That is going to be extremely difficult.

I know I might sound like an obsessed freak, but why me? Why, after years of teaching (some say brainwashing...I stick to teaching) does my kid want to eat school food? It's so gross! Why can't he see that?

So this is the bottom line, from the Doc: do not qualify food. Give them a good foundation at home, teach them about nutrition and healthy choices, but do not give them a sense of deprivation. A feeling of deprivation leads to food issues down the road.

The last thing I want is my kid to have food issues as an adult. You know, those kids who go off to college and do nothing but binge.

I did not binge in college, nor have I eaten poorly (for extended periods) at any point in my life. What did my parents do? Probably nothing intentionally, but they never qualified food. Food was never an issue.

At home we ate real, home cooked food. Mom packed my lunch almost all of the time, but I clearly remember eating school lunch (and I am sure it was just as gross back then--same school district as my kids are in now). I remember eating fast food occasionally, although not past high school. That's right, I have not stepped into a Mc'Ds since high school. I'm 33.

So this is it, this is where I am. I had to write it down. I feed my kids 35 meals a week, approximately. That's 3 square meals and two snacks (I probably do it more often because little kid #2 still grazes). 35 meals a week and I am most concerned with the five he eats at school. 35 meals a week, and I am stressed out about letting him eat school lunch once a week. 35 meals a week.

And so last night, in a moment of internal angst, I calmly told Kid #1 that he could buy a school lunch once a week. I didn't make it a big deal. His response was, "Cool mom, thanks. I would like to buy the day that there are Cheetos." (sad moment for me)

Here is my response to any criticisms: While I understand nutrition, I also understand human behavior. I understand that a sense of deprivation in regards to food, likely leads to future eating problems.